Twenty-three and arrested for destruction of property. I was mad at the world, and in love with Jack Daniels. Police detective Gary Watts was a friend of the family and familiar with my issues. Mostly because he knew my dad and what my dad did to me when I was thirteen. My dad got 20 years in prison.
Two months ago my dad was dead. Killed in prison I have been going nuts ever since. The hospital said it is PTSD. While Mr. Watts agrees he justs thinks what my did did to me made me gay. He was also kind enough to come of his own closet just to save my life.Â
There I was handcuffed and he just starts kissing me. Not sure why I was piss and screaming for him to stop. Yet there I was kissing him back. After about two more minutes I was so turned on I just want to have gay sex. Despite still being in handcuffs and having our clothes on we kind of did have sex. When it was over and as we calmed down. He made me admit I enjoyed it and admit I wanted more.
Gary paid my bail and took me home with him. It was weird, and slightly twisted because of what my dad did thirteen years ago. Greg and I were adults having gay sex. What i had to wrap my head around was what my dad did was abuse to a kid. I was left so confused. Did my dad make me do gay stuff because he thought I was gay, or knew I was gay before I did? Was my dad just a pervert, and the sex part made me gay. He went to jail for it and was killed. All those answer died with him.
72 hours later I go see my mom and she thinks I am not the same person. The pain and stress that shown on my face was gone. I told her I was gay and trying to figure out what that means. She gave me a hug like never before. She said she would become a lesbian before dating a man like my dad again. She said there are worse things than being gay, I could be like my father. I had not laughed like that for such a long time.
Gary and I drive to Chicago where there were just so many gay guys at one bar, and there were three bars on one block all full of guy dudes. I started to get the big picture. He made it clear he was not interested in a relationship with someone my age. I lived at his house for three months, before moving back in with my mom. He is transferring to somewhere out of state. He prefers living in the closet in his line of work.
I got my CDL license and started driving a semi. Just to freak out about how many "straight guys" living "straight" lives do gay stuff. The whole world sucks, for the way treat gay people when most of us are doing gay stuff. For the first time ever I can say I am happy and I am gay. I can find a hot man to sleep with every night if I want. I just don't how this could get better.
Then I pick a kid headed for San Diego that says he will do anything for a ride. Best road trip ever, Slight change in plans he is going to ride with me to Seattle now, and then we will see what come next. Damn it does gets even better again.
Destruction of Me - Story Time Blog
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