Cameras in the locker room were against the rules. A student took a video of two coaches making fun of the gay guy. The gay guy in question was naked at the time. It was posted on a social app. by a new email account but deleted.
Two years later in the same locker room I took this pic.
This is that same gay guys butt two years later. Being gay was in fact all in my head. I am Justin 18 football wide receiver and have never done anything gay. In fact, just the opposite I fool around with chicks all most every weekend. It is all part of the pretend world I live in 24 / 7. I pretend with my parents.
My dad purchased a huge box of condoms for me and stashed them in the garage. Then he seem to to questioned why I was not using them. He had to be assuming I was having sex with girls without them. At the time I thought he wanted me to have more sex. Mom has made it a point to become friends with all the cheer Mom's hoping to hook me up with a nice girl. We pretend.
There were 152 adults educating 1573 students. I would guess about forty female support staff flirts with me on a regular basis. Fifteen male teachers and coaches talk about sex with girls. 2 Male teachers get all nervous when I hand my homework their handshake.
Mr. Johnson my English teacher had an after-school study hall. I stopped by to ask about the final exam. He was a mess. I asked if I made him nervous because he is gay and attracted to me. His reply was. This was his last year teaching high school students when he was moving to middle school. I took his hand as if to shake it but held on. Giving it a squeeze I tell Mr. Johnson thanks. He was one of my favorite teachers. I could see the stress leave his face. It was like he had just come out and I had acknowledged it and said I am fine with it. I left wondering if I had just outed myself.
Which brings me to Mitch the gay guy butt pic. I watch from a distance as he navigates our school as the one student willing to admit he wants to have sex with a guy. Today we were in health class, a table of six guys in an all-guy class. The teacher steps out of the room, everyone is just taking in groups. I asked Mitch so how do you know if you are gay? If you have never had gay sex? You cannot be good at it if you have never done it before.
Mitch's reply: I know I am gay because when I think about kissing you, I get turned on. You are right about the needing practice part would you like to volunteer to help me out with that? The guys at the table were laughing and accusing me of turning red. Pete asked was the offer exclusive and just for Justin. Mitch told Pete that he was cute enough and he would be more than willing to help him lose his virgin status. We were all getting turned on with the conversation and relieved the teacher returned when he did.
Six years after my first OMG I am gay thought. All because of a butt pic. I could not get that pic out of my head or the guy it belonged to. I was going to my car and saw a conversation between Pete and Mitch after school. Why would Pete being talk to my gay guy? I am thinking about our conversation in class. I got the idea Pete was going to volunteer. In my pretend world Mitch was my boyfriend waiting for me to come out. The reality was Mitch was not waiting for anyone. It was the whole point of him coming out. He wanted to be gay now. I asked myself aloud. Why are you… waiting for you… to come out?
I got home to find my dad home from work early. They are moving his office at work he came home to get out of the way. He was at his desk in the study. I looked in the door and we made eye contact. He said hello and I replied I am thinking about coming out as gay later tonight. It that going to be a problem for us.
Dad said I love you; I do not care who you love. He smiled, I smiled. I said best dad ever and walked to my room thinking that was not so hard. How did that happen? I shower, change my clothes, and drive over to see Mitch.
His dad is a Vet, and in a wheelchair. He lost his leg in Afghanistan. He was in the driveway as I pulled up. I got out and asked if Mitch was home. I told him my name was Justin, a friend from school. His dad started crying saying he was sorry. It was PTSD. He said he had been waiting to meet me for an exceptionally long time. Mitch came out to the garage and freaked when he saw me. What are you doing here?
Right there and in front of his dad. I say I came to tell you I am gay, and I am sorry it has taken so long to tell you. I have loved you for a very long time. I was hoping we could spend time together. Be boyfriends or something...
Mitch looked at his dad who was still crying and asked if he was all right. He looks at Mitch points to me and blubbering he states Anonymous video. It was him. I freaked out. How did he know? I look at Mitch. Who was also crying and said See my room? I walked over picked him up and kissed him hard on his mouth. I put him down, he grabs my hand and pulls me inside. His dad yelling keeps that door opened.
Mitch closed the door anyway. Turns out it we knew how to do gay stuff. No practice was necessary. We were lying in bed talking about that video I posted two years ago. Mitch's mom came home at five thirty and told us to shower and get ready for dinner.
My father showed up at 6. Mitch's dad called him, and my dad states to him I had just told him I was gay. All these adults knew that the police had traced the video and the email to me, my cell phone. I was the one that busted the coaches. All this time no asked me about it. I thought I had gotten away with it.
My dad was afraid they could be outing me before I was ready to come out. It could be the opposite seen and sticking me with a label if I am not gay. All very proud because I did the right thing, they decided to leave at that. Everyone was waiting just in case today was even or ever a possibility.
My coach once said I sit on the sidelines and wait for me to call you and put into a game. He said Twice this year you told me to put you in. That you got this. You scored a touchdown both times. You cannot play it safe all the time. You must step up. Put it out there, what it is that you want. Tell people how you feel, and what is important to you.
I was a sophomore. Shortly after that I got him fired. The gay part took longer.
The Gay Part - Story Time Blog
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